Weekend Escape: Road trip to Salem

“I’ll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!”
“Oh, look. Another glorious morning. Makes me sick!”
“Vanquish demon first, kill husband later.”
“Relax…it’s only magic. Now who’s pathetic?”

Witchy quotes to intro into a witchy post. October 2019 Zoe and I decided we absolutely had to embrace our witchy vibes and head to Salem, Massachusetts. Our souls were craving magic, spooks, and to be smacked in the face with with the crunchy smell of fall.

Salem delivered.

Our journey starts on a Friday afternoon, we’re a bit more organized for this trip than the Montreal weekend trip – we leave about the time we say we’re going to and we get to the hostel at a decent time that evening. The drive time was a little over 4-hrs with traffic.

So this is where I’ll level with you, our hostel in all reality is more or less a halfway house. We picked up on those vibes rather quickly as nearly all of the lodgers are an older crowd of folks that are a bit…permanent to the property. That being said, this place was so cheap – and available – that I’ll stop complaining there.

Wait, one last complaint – the old dudes smoked right outside our window shootin’ the shit at all hours and it was near impossible to sleep…that was actually the worst part.

Now back to the fun parts 🙂

The weekend we were in Salem was the weekend before Halloween so you bet that it was crowded and had a plethora of stuff going on. There was a sick Dark Arts Festival held in the evening in the Old Salem Village, and my god it was Chilling Adventures of Sabrina vibes to the max.

I mean just check these vibes:

We also attended a witch trial reenactment, learned about our past lives, our futures, and we went to a midnight seance hosted by mentalist Jon Stetson.

I will say, the seance was cool, but Zoe and I spent like $60 each and thought it was a real seance we were going to. We completely overlooked the keyword “mentalist” which basically is a dude who is incredibly observant of human behavior and has set up specific situations which have a guaranteed result.

He ended with openly saying everything was fake and then used his platform to talk about his life struggles and perseverance.

Which kudos to him, but we thought we were going to be talking to dead people, not messed with mentally and then lectured at the end.

So major advice – don’t rush-book a seance if you want to experience something quality. But totally book this guy, or others of the like, if you’re a scaredy cat but still want to feel like you did something spooky.

Weekend Escape: Road Trip to Montreal

Sometimes New York is just too much.

It’s too busy, too hectic, the amount of people can be suffocating.

Did you think that I never get tired of the city? That I don’t miss the rolling hills of corn you pass while flying down country roads, windows rolled all the way down? A quietness so immense you can hear a mouse fart?

Of course there are days that I miss it, it’s where I was born and raised.

Most New Yorkers also hit a point when they need out of the city, just a little break, and three day weekends are the perfect opportunity to do just that.

President’s Day weekend 2019 Zoe and I decided to rent a car and road trip it up to Montreal with a few New England stops on the way. Seems like a great, straight forward endeavor right?

LOL.

We had this perfectly planned out trip where we depart at 12.00 p.m. on Friday, hit Providence, RI [drive time of 2 hours from my apartment] to take a peek at what it’s all about, then we go to Boston [drive time of 1.5hrs from Providence] for dinner, then Montreal [drive time of 5.5hrs].

So in total, this trip should’ve taken 9 hours, plus 1.5 for dinner and stops. I created a mapped out google doc that said so.

How long did it actually take us?

OVER THIRTEEN HOURS.

So what caused this delay?

Let’s list it off:

  • Right off the bat, our start time was off, we didn’t leave until 3:30 p.m.
  • Traffic. Traffic. Traffic.
  • Boston has a massive underground tunnel system not for the weak of heart or sensitive GPS systems. I kid you not Boston might as well have its own world underground – it felt kin to that of a Purgatory. Will you make it out of the tunnels? Only if God allows.
  • Last but not least, we took quite a few fresh air stops to awaken our tiring souls

Boston was such a hot mess getting to, realistically we should’ve given up [we really were tangled in those tunnels for so long..] but the level of determination to see Boston was intense.

That being said, when we finally made it, we were enchanted. It was so quaint.. so charming.. it’s been decided a formal trip needs planned there asap. Boston is deserving of it’s own weekend.

Now.. the next moment to highlight the level of delirium..

THE BORDER.

Picture it: It’s 4:00 a.m. and two twenty-somethings, who have been driving for nearly 12 hours, approach the border.

It’s intimidating and doesn’t make sense.

As we approach, there is a sign that says, “WAIT TO PULL FORWARD UNTIL SIGNAL

Frantically, we’re both looking for a signal of sorts – a light maybe??

Then we see an arm extend out of the building ahead, motioning us forward.

Signal?!” we whisper to each other frantically.

So I inch the vehicle forward and we’re faced with a stern looking officer who quickly bombards us with the questions, “Where are you coming from? Why are you visiting? Who are you visiting? Where are you staying? Whose car is this? When are you leaving?

We answer them all reasonably enough, then we get our passports back – all good to go!

So I hit the gas, but the car isn’t moving…

I push the pedal harder, harder, to the floor. The engine is revving so loud in the sleek Dodge Charger but we aren’t moving…

What kind of Canadian border magic is this?!” I wonder.

Then, I assess the car in more detail.

I 100% forgot that I put it in park.

Then it clicks – I just revved my engine at a Canadian Border Patrol Police Officer.

Oh my god.

In the US, a rev of the engine is considered a challenge – what if it’s the same in Canada or what if it’s worse??

I turn to look at him, my mouth open and eyes wide in shock, I owe him some kind of explanation for my weird behavior, right?

I, uh, forgot the, uh” I say rather intelligently while looking between him and my dashboard.

It’s okay.” he stifles a laugh.

While Zoe is next to me whisper-yelling, “DUDE GO GO GO GO BEFORE HE DOESN’T LET US IN!

Queue my zoom out of there.

So that’s how we made it into Canada.

The rest of the weekend was spent stuffing face with various poutines, all the coffees, beaucoup de franglais, hating the way they all say deux [they say it like dur], too much wind in the arctic tundra for us to handle at times, more shopping than our bank accounts would like, and we both got tattoos.

Below are key locations of our weekend 🙂

STAY

Samesun Hostel book on HostelWorld

Samesun Hostel | Montreal, QB

We stayed at Samesun Hostel which was incredibly affordable and if it cost anymore than what we paid I’d be bitter af.

We arrived around 4AM, the guy seemed to have a hard time understanding what was going on and why we were arriving when we did – even though we literally gave them a heads up that afternoon what our latest ETA would be. But he finally got it together and gave us our towels and room keys.

We journey down some stairs and a corridor, before we make it to our room. We open the door and we’re hit with it.

We are hit with the nastiest smell you could ever imagine, and we immediately begin gagging uncontrollably. We frantically glance around the room both looking for a free bed and the source of the smell.

Zoe frantically whispers, “Those are dudes in those beds.

Aw hell nah.

No way are staying in a room with 10 nasty-smellin-ass boys – especially when we paid for an all girls dorm. No, no, no. Not happening sorry.

We rapidly evacuate the room – still gagging – and force the front desk dude to change our room to what we booked.

After that, it was smooth sailing. The beds were hostel-level fine, the breakfast was pretty decent, and it was located in a decent spot where we could walk nearly everywhere.

EATS

Clam Chowder + Lobster Mac & Cheese

The Aviary | Swansea, MA

The Aviary was our New England dinner stop on the way up, and all I have to say is wow, did this place live up to our expectations of everything we thought traditional New England cuisine would be.

The lobster in the lobster mac was so fresh it quite literally got us all hot and bothered.

This poutine was either the duck or the pulled pork…I think it was the duck…

Hippi Poutine | Montreal, QB

This place was straight fire from top to bottom.

The poutine was everything we wanted and then some, and they had the cutest french children’s books everywhere.

It also was incredibly close to the hostel – approx. 10 min walk.

Pain Perdu

Café Chat L’Heureux | Montreal, QB

This is a cat cafe – need I say more?!

I don’t, but that doesn’t mean I won’t 🙂

Café Chat L’Heureux has you remove your shoes upon entering to keep the place clean and cozy for the cats. They also serve a great cappuccino and decadent desserts – each table also has a detailed paper with the cat’s photos, names, zodiac signs, and if they’re available for adoption :’)

Biscuits & Gravy + Breakfast Potatoes

Penny Cluse Cafe | Burlington, VT

Penny Cluse was our exit brunch of the journey. This place echoed the New England quintessential charm and had such a homey diner vibe. It had major Luke’s from Gilmore Girls vibes now that I think about it.

If you find yourself in Burlington, Vermont – this has to be on your list.

Irish English Oddities

I read in a book once that American English is technically closer to what Shakespeare would have spoken than British English today.  This goes back to, of course, the settlement of the first American colonies.  We kept the same style of English as our forefathers (mostly) while it later changed over in England.  This is why there are different words for the same thing in England, for example, “tap” versus “faucet.”  Now this is really interesting but…what about Irish English?

Although you may not realize this, Irish English has loads of different expressions, pronunciations and quirks that standard British English does not have, and even more so when comparing it to American English!  So, since I’m an American who’s obsessed with linguistics and used to live in Ireland, I figured it would be silly for me to not write an entry about the oddities I’ve heard over there from my lovely Irish friends.

1) The “like” tag

My fellow Americans and I are very aware of the word “like” and whether we like it or not, we use this word probably way too often than ever necessary.  The Irish, however, also use “like” quite often, but in a very different way!  Instead of weaving “like” several times into a sentence, they add it on just at the end of sentences.  Here are some examples:

American: “I know that I, like, did this myself and, like, probably should have studied more.”

Irish: “I know I should have studied more.  I did it to myself, like.

This “like” tag sounds VERY weird at first to an American ear, but you adjust to it and honestly, if I heard an Irish person using “like” the same way I did, it would feel like it was forced.  Just like when an American tries to use the “like” tag in order to assimilate into Ireland…it just doesn’t seem to work.

2) The “so” tag

I’m going to be honest, I’m not 100% sure about when this can be used.  I’ve tried finding an American equivalent, but it’s difficult.  Basically, Irish people like to add “so” to the end of sentences sometimes.  One case I’ve heard it used is something like an American adding “then” to the end of a sentence.

American: Maybe I’ll do that then.

Irish: Maybe I’ll do that so.

This could be wrong, however.  If anyone understands this phenomenon, please explain.

3) “C’mere” (come here)

My closest friend here uses this all the time (actually she uses all of the things I’m pointing out, so sorry to pick on ya).  When getting someone’s attention to say something, they’ll say, “c’mere” as if you need to come closer but, really, you don’t need to.  I was so confused by this at first because I’d be sitting right next to my friend and she’d be like “but c’mere what do you think of the assignment so far?”  And I’d awkwardly move closer as if she’s about to tell me some big secret.  But nope.  It’s just a statement opener, I suppose.

4) “Now!”

This is one of those things that you never notice but when you do, you can never un-notice it.  It’s adorable.  Basically, at the start of any given sentence or action, and Irish person might say, “now!”

For example:

Now! Where do you want to go for lunch?”

“Now!” *stands up to buy coffee.*

*sits back down and opens laptop* “Now!” *starts reading emails*

Literally, this can be used for anything and has no particular meaning other than the start of a phrase or action.

5) “Sure didn’t (he)”

Yet another confusing oddity of Irish English is the “sure didn’t.”  Okay, the way that Irish people use this is confusing to an American ear because it almost sounds like they’re asking you for clarity or reassurance…but it also doesn’t make sense for them to need to ask.  Let me just show an example:

Irish: “I worked so hard on that essay and sure didn’t the professor go and fail me.”

American: “did he?  I think that’s what you told me earlier…or did he not? Wait, why are you asking me???”

My Irish friend and I discovered the use of this expression, though.  It’s kind of like, “…and can you believe he went and failed me?” or “…and he went and failed me anyway!”  I guess, it’s an expression of shock or disbelief of the sort.

6) “Ye”

I don’t believe that this one is difficult for an American ear to understand, because we’ve heard this used in old-timey movies and whatnot. “Hear ye! Hear ye!” <– ring a bell?

Anyway, “ye” is the pronoun for plural you.  American English doesn’t use “ye” but we realize that it can be confusing to say “you” when referring to more than one person.  This is why Americans will say “you guys” or “you all” or the ever-beloved, “y’all.”

This is the correct pronoun for plural you in old English, so really I suppose it’s just something they never got rid of.  I love it though!

7) “You alright?”

This is only odd for Americans to hear because of the circumstances.  When you enter a bar or sit down at a table at a pub, the bartender or server asks, “you alright?”

This used to bother me because it always caught me off guard and I’d forget how to order a beer.  I’d be like “oh yea I’m fine thanks uhhh Guinness??”  It’s like in America when someone is walking past you and shouts “what’s up?” as if you can tell them what you’re about to go do while walking AWAY from them.  How do you respond??  I always want to tell waitresses that I’m not-so-alright because I’m hangry and don’t wanna talk about my feelings although they’ve insisted you tell them your current state of being, or alrightness.

I’m honestly still a bit taken aback when they ask “you alright” but I’ve gotten used to ignoring their question and just politely ordering.

8) “Ju”

This doesn’t need to much explaining.  Basically, “did you” or “do you” just squishes together into “ju.”  They not only use this orally, but they also text it.

9) “Your man” or “Your one”

This phrase still makes me giggle. So, say you’re in a bar and you’ve told your friends that a guy sitting a table over is total jackass. They might say something like “How did you meet your man?”

As an American, I’d be like, “my MAN??” He’s the farthest thing from being MY MAN!! However, when an Irish person uses the phrase “your man” or “your one,” they’re only referencing someone. It doesn’t even have to be a reference to someone you’ve already talked about. Maybe your Irish friend sees someone wearing a tacky outfit and says “Your one looks ready for the circus.”

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I realize that I could write forever on this topic and there are also so many things I could say about pronunciations and accents, but I feel like the 9 things listed got my point across.  Irish English is indeed different from American English and can be rather puzzling sometimes!  I hope this helps you all understand someone if you’re traveling to Ireland or maybe you can fake a few of these to make Irish people think you’re Irish. (Trust me, they will not fall for that, but give it a go).