Mindfulness Magic

Stop what you’re doing for a second. Stop reading this and do these five things:

  1. Look around the room and name five things that you can see.
  2. Focus on four things that you can feel.
  3. Name three things that you can hear.
  4. Notice two things that you can smell. 
  5. Focus on one thing that you can taste.

Congrats! You’ve just completed your first grounding technique that is taught many times in practicing mindfulness. It’s supposed to help bring you back into the present moment, which is a main component of mindfulness.

Mindfulness, noun: the state of being conscious or aware of something.

Headspace.com describes mindfulness as, “…the quality of being present and fully engaged with whatever we’re doing at the moment — free from distraction or judgment, and aware of our thoughts and feelings without getting caught up in them.”

A lot of us are always going, always moving, thinking “okay when I get off work I have to do ____.”, “I can’t wait until the weekend so I can go ____.”, “I’m so worried about ____ because I can’t control ____.”

Does that sound familiar? It’s because we’re not present. We’re not living the beautiful moment that is right now. Everything before this moment is unchangeable, and everything after this moment is unpredictable. Sure, it’s okay to get excited about something happening in your future, but think about the times when that thought of excitement turns into anxious thoughts, worrying, etc. It sucks and it causes a lot of issues — I’m speaking from lots of experience. Even as I write this I’m experiencing it. LOL.

Have you ever thought about how mindful you’re being at any given moment? Researchers on mindfulness put together this quick little questionnaire to help you out!

You might be wondering why this matters — what are the benefits to being more mindful? Lucky for you, Headspace is back at it again with the wonderful information you need:

  • You’ll have lower glucose levels.
    • Researchers at Brown University found that those who scored higher in mindfulness were more likely to have healthier glucose levels than those who scored lower.
    • Mindful people are more inclined to believe they can change important things in their life as well, found in a study from the University of Pennsylvania. Mindfulness helps people feel less ashamed when presented with advice; making them more motivated to change.
  • Develop better eating habits.
    • Think about it! (Pun intended). Being more thoughtful about your food choices would obviously help you identify when you’re hungry, satiated, or too full.
  • Less anxiety and stress.
    • Researchers at Georgetown University Medical Center found that patients with anxiety disorder (omg meeeeeeee) had reduced stress hormone and inflammatory responses to stressful situations after taking a mindfulness meditation course.
  • Better ability to focus and improved memory.
    • Again, researchers published papers in the Journal of Management finding mindfulness stabilizes attention to the present moment. Those who studied mindfulness meditation were more likely to remain vigilant longer during tasks.
    • UC Santa Barbara researchers found that simply two weeks of mindfulness training can improve reading comprehension, working memory capacity, and ability to focus.
  • An increase in pain relief.
    • Wake Forest Baptist researchers conducted a double-blinded study including 78 healthy volunteers, and found that pain was reduced by over 20% after meditation.
  • Better sleep! Yay!
    • According to an article published by JAMA Internal Medicine, sleep from meditation improved in older adults that had trouble sleeping.

So like… where’s the negative? I’ve had some pushback from people when I express my love for mindfulness meditation and I don’t get it. What’s the worst that could happen? Even if you tried meditating for 10 minutes and didn’t feel you were “doing it right”, you were still able to get 10 minutes to yourself, right? You time is the most important time.

You deserve to live in the moment. You deserve to be present. You deserve not to worry or feel anxiety about the past or the future, because it’s unchangeable. What already happened, happened. And what’s going to happen, is going to happen, whether you like it or not.

I’ll leave you with a quote by boss babe meditation teacher and author, Megan Monahan:

“There is no good or bad meditation. The only bad meditation is the one you don’t do.”

“Don’t Hate, Meditate” – Episode 312 of Highest Self Podcast

Lindsey MorrowLeave a comment

Finding Peace

This article is the conclusion to a journey I began years ago. I’ve shared some personal stories about domestic abuse, some destructive coping mechanisms I used, and now it is time to talk about the peace I found after it all. I kept reiterating in my previous articles how we are not the victims forever, and I stand by that to this day. I wouldn’t be where I am without these humbling experiences. I grew my own wings that my gut was trying to tell me to do for years. With the help of my friends and family and self-determination, I was able to be the woman I always knew I was.

Initially, I was scared. I had no money, no motivation, and felt like my career was in the hole, and I had to block out a lot of people in my life. But what was really happening was that I was saving money, building stronger relationships with my close friends, and truly focusing on myself for once. I found myself developing a skin routine and a forming a healthy diet. I planned my future. I went back to college and now am on a path to graduate in a year.

What also became a constant in my life was spirituality. I never had been a religious person and I’m still not. Yet, I found spirituality really explained and helped me with a lot of things that have happened in my life. We all say cliche things like “everything happens for a reason” and “there are no such things as coincidences.“ Heck, I truly believe all that now! I believe people are put into and removed from your life and it’s all apart of the journey. Some people are not meant to be along for the ride and that’s okay. I came to the conclusion that I could find peace in knowing the things I can control vs the things I cannot and should not force. I have everything I need in my life to make the difference I’ve always wanted to make.

I made a vow to not let another person, especially a man, ruin or disrupt my inner peace. Yes, there are days where that was very hard to do, but ultimately, I am happy without the stress and chaos. I truly am blessed to have gotten to know the side of a man that I never thought I’d see again. I had been given a gift in the form a gentle, kind, selfless, respectful human. My boyfriend was put into my life and I have cherished every waking moment with him. He is a significant factor that has played a huge part in my searching for peace. He helped me realize that just because I was a victim and enabler before, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen again and that is such a relieving feeling to know I’m still able to love and to be loved.

For the women or men that have walked in these shoes, there is happiness and success resting on the other side of this hill. Peace is found in many forms: a loving friend’s smile, a cup of coffee in the morning, and instead of thinking about your troubling past….you think about your exciting dreams, a week secluded in the woods watching the sunset, connecting with a religion or your spirituality, starting a self care routine, or even writing about your journey and being able to appreciate the things currently around you that you never thought would come from it. We all deserve peace and you will find it.

. . .

If you or someone you know is being affected by abuse and needing support, call 1-800-799-7233, or if you are unable to speak safely, you can log onto thehotline.org or text LOVEIS to 1-866-9474.

You are not alone.

Koreena BirdwellLeave a comment

When to Let Go & Let Karma

People usually aren’t that surprised to learn I’m an older sister. I tend to give off Type A vibes and even if I’m the drunkest person in the room, I’m still the quickest to sober up and help someone who’s in a worse state of mind than I am. What does surprise people is the amount of siblings I have – a whopping five. I have three not-so-little brothers and two not-so-little sisters and we’re all stair-stacked in age – 25, 23, 20, 18, 14, and 12. We all have severely different personalities, but within the differences obviously there are some defining traits that unify us as siblings. We all have a sharp tongue, zero patience for stupid questions, and we’re all incredibly selective about who we let get close to us.

So with us having severely different personalities yet a similar approach to people in terms of being guarded and slightly aggressive, you can imagine how intense some conversations can get within the Smith Clan.

Most recently I had a crazy theological discussion/debate with my 20 year old brother, Jackson. Now, as some background, Jack has a photographic memory, his head is full of the most random knowledge of the most intricate of things, we joke that a conversation with him is “Jack Jeopardy“. He’s an actor who’s been on stage since he was in elementary, which has empowered him to have a great speaking voice and everything he says is laced with such a projected conviction that you feel no need to dispute him half of the time as he seems as reputable as Wikipedia.

Jack has always had a rampant imagination that has him questioning every basic level thing most take for granted, which somehow transcended through age into him being able to have long conversations with anyone about anything – even on topics he genuinely knows nothing about. He knows how to ask those thought provoking questions that push the conversations along through twists and turns you hadn’t originally intended.

It was the other day when Jack and I somehow had a conversation about beliefs and Christianity that morphed into the power of karma. I am a firm believer that what goes around comes around, karma is real and you can’t convince me otherwise. Jack on the other hand, strongly argues that karma is interpreted completely wrong this day and age. He insists that karma isn’t about instant just consequences, the idea of karma transcends lifetimes and what you do in this life, affects your next life, and what you experience now is a product of your past life. So with Jack’s definition of karma, he doesn’t think that karma is enough in terms of punishment, because if someone does something bad in this lifetime, they won’t reap the effects of it until their next lifetime, and what’s the good in that?

These two ideologies of karma, one with rapid consequences and one with not so rapid consequences, is what lead to the big debate: Let go and let karma?

Jack will tell you…

Heck, no. Karma isn’t real, and if it is how could you possibly trust karma to take care of someone that has done serious wrongs, like Henry Kissinger? He is a man who should be charged with war crimes, but he won’t ever get punished for them. He should pay for the terrible things he has done, how can someone be as rich as him and also walk away unscathed from the bad he has done if karma is real? If karma is truly real, he would pay for these crimes, since what goes around comes around. Furthermore, if karma is real, it is not enough of a punishment, karma is nothing more than an excuse for societal inaction. Individuals need to take onus, for we are responsible for our own reality, delivering justice where justice is due, and we should not leave the fate of terrible people up to the universe.

To that I say…

It’s complicated. While I am a firm believer in karma, I fullheartedly agree that we are responsible for our own reality. These two things, karma and onus, coincide for me in that I don’t believe in always handing the reigns over to karma. Not at all. If you are presented with a situation where there is an obvious bad party involved, follow the below procedure:

Made on Canva by Peachy Keen Collective

The are two very different endings to the above, you’re either letting go or you’re actively trying to correct the situation. For the sake of the conversation, Jack heavily focused on Henry Kissinger being a prime example of how karma isn’t real or isn’t enough. But if you’re a believer in karma you’ll understand the following:

Karma is not always obvious.

It is very easy to think that wealthy people couldn’t possibly ever reap the effects of karma because they have so much money to ward it off. But karma wouldn’t get to someone in a way that isn’t right for them, karma isn’t going to come at the rich by attempting to drain their bank account dry with broken down car after broken down car.

Karma comes at each individual appropriately.

Maybe Henry Kissinger will never know true happiness, maybe none of his friends are real, maybe most people in his closest circle hate his guts. You can’t tell me little things like that aren’t micro acts of karma coming to play. So if you can sit back and let karma do its thing, then it’s better to think in this mentality, that karma is not in the big things, it’s in in the little things. Just as the little things can bring you happiness, the little things can also pile up and crush you down.

Sometimes, karma needs a hand.

Back to Henry Kissinger, I know, I know, it’s random but so is my brother so this is where the conversation went. Jack says karma is an excuse for societal inaction – if this is the case, then honestly, be the change you wish to see. What can you do to make Henry Kissinger uncomfortable? Email him, send him letters of everything he’s done wrong and that which makes him a war criminal in your eyes. Batter him with reminders of his wrongdoings. Be the bell constantly ringing in his ear.

There’s always something you can do.

So this translates into other areas of life, if someone in your work or personal life has done something that’s simply wrong – think about your options and how you can right the wrong, whether it’s a direct conversation with them calling them out, or maybe the wrong is deeper than that and a higher entity needs to get involved – do what is right. This is also where karma becomes a bit self-serving, when you’re righting the wrongs of others for a greater purpose, you are also bringing good karma upon yourself. What goes around comes around, remember?

. . .

Ultimately, it’s up to you whether you let go and let karma. While I personally believe in the power of karma, and have very much seen it rear its head and kick dirt into the face of those most deserving, some people haven’t seen it and/or simply don’t believe in it – like my brother. While, him and I were able to have this insane discussion on karma, the funny thing is… he really doesn’t believe in it at all. Not one bit – even what he described karma to be, he doesn’t believe in that either. But he is able to see how others can believe, and is able to have a conducive conversation about it in order to better understand the world and those that live in it.

Emily SmithLeave a comment

Podcasts Are Taking Over My Life

It’s a problem, y’all. I’ll have to admit, I was a little late to the podcast world which is weird — especially since I have a degree in radio. Or maybe that’s why I didn’t listen to them for so long? Either way it’s better late than never.

Now you can catch me listening to them any chance I get. I love a day to myself when I can get chores done and pod’ it up all day LOL. Okay wow I’m never saying that again. The point is, whenever I’m not listening to podcasts, I’m thinking about the next time I’ll get the chance to listen to a podcast.

I’m sure you’re wondering, “Wow Lindsey, all this podcast talk so you must have some great suggestions, huh?” Why yes I do! Thank you so much for asking. Here are my current favorites:

Manifestation Babe Podcast with Kathrin Zenkina will get you SO pumped at wanting to get your shit together. If you’re a fan of “The Secret”, then this is the podcast for you. We love to hear a good “from nothing to something” story, and Kathrin has a beautiful one. She has played a huge role in my spiritual growth, meditations, manifestation practices and MORE. I am forever indebted to her. I can’t wait for the day that we’re best friends.

Impact Theory with Tom Bilyeu has taught me a lot about… a lot. Basically. He interviews an insane amount of talented people on topics like money, meditation, mindset, social media, etc. There’s a show out there for everyone. I love the fact that he has celebs on the show too — it gets them in a setting you normally don’t see them in which I can definitely respect. I always finish listening to one of his shows feeling like I gained something positive.

The Mark Groves Podcast normally leaves me feeling either warm and fuzzy inside or like I got smacked in the face. He’s not afraid to have the hard conversations, more often than not it’s exactly what I need to hear at the time. A few of my favorites are when he sits down with LeAnn Rimes, Mark Manson, and talks about holding space for others.

Tracy Otsuka’s ADHD for Smart Ass Women — DUH! It’s so good I’m in the Facebook group. I will say, it makes my ears want to bleed when someone says they’ve found their “tribe,” but if I were to say that, this group would be it. Tracy is so helpful in teaching and talking with others who teach all their tips and tricks for dealing with ADHD. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t hate having ADHD, but I also don’t love it… yet. (I’m learning to, ok?? We’re all on this self-love journey together.)

And last, but DEFINITELY not least, the Call Her Daddy podcast. That’s right. One of my girlfriends introduced me to this last year and I’ve been obsessed ever since. If you want the best for you AND your partner, give this a listen. Alex is hilarious and has given me quite a few pointers to say the least… 😉 Alex did have a co-host (Sophia) at one point but they’re no longer together, and the tea on that is PIPING HOT!!!

CONTENT WARNING: This is not for the faint of heart (men). There are many people (men) out there who aren’t comfortable with strong women talking about their sexuality even though it’s 2020! Maybe if the haters (men) of this show gave it a listen and opened their minds, they (men) would learn that we all deserve to have good sex. Not just them (men).

Okay phew wow anywayyy those are my fave podcasts! Let me know yours! Love ya

Lindsey Morrow1 Comment

New Age Christianity

Growing up, I spent my life bouncing between Pendleton, Indiana and Elizabethtown, Kentucky – distance between the two is about 3 hours driving. The back and forth, as one could guess, is due to my parents divorcing when I was incredibly young.

In all fairness, now I can reflect that my parents were also incredibly young.

They had a blossoming relationship in college – having met at an esteemed Greek mixer party at Western Kentucky University. One thing led to another, and here I came into existence folks.

My parents did the sensible Kentucky thing by dropping out of college, getting hitched, and embracing family life.

A couple years later I had a sister, and a bit after that I had two homes in two different states, two Christmases, two birthdays, more siblings, along with summers and every other weekend in Kentucky with Dad and all schooling went to Mom in Indiana.

The divorce is when my life became severely complex, and even though only being 3 going on 4, it was clear that if I adapted and rolled with the punches, life would be easier.

After the divorce, both my parents took to God.

In Indiana, my mom was able to put my sister and I into a Catholic private school, St. Ambrose, in Anderson. Religion was a firm part of the curriculum and equated importance to that of Math and Science, we went to mass as a school once a week – or more if there was a holiday. In addition, my mom, sister, and I went to mass together over the weekend.

St. Ambrose is where I did most of my growing and where I found the most foundation for being the caring, compassionate person I am today. St. Ambrose didn’t teach the hate or harshness that Catholics have the rep for. No, St. Ambrose full frontal lectured to show unconditional love and kindness to all those who cross your path, and it was made clear if we retained nothing else, this we must retain.

In Kentucky, my dad and step-mom bounced around church shopping for a hot second until settling on where we still attend to this day, United Memorial Methodist Church, in Elizabethtown.

This was so different to being Catholic.

Often, my siblings and I went to Sunday School instead of being forced to sit through an hour long sermon, but as the years went by we were sitting in the sermon instead. I learned through the Methodist Church that there are many different ways to praise God together. There can be a full band playing Christian songs you’ve never heard before, praising God in a church doesn’t have to be mechanical acts that you need to learn and memorize – there’s no earning any rights of passage or “leveling up” if you will.

Overall, I really learned that there is no wrong way to get with God.

I also learned that I don’t need to choose one way or another either. I have the capacity to embrace both just fine.

In fact, I learned I have the capacity for more than that.

In high school, my friends and I began dabbling in tarot cards – which is a hardcore Catholic no go.

Tarot cards are devil’s work.

But I had a really hard time understanding, I mean, if God is such an awesome God, why will he damn me to hell for channeling the very intuition he gave me?

I decided very early on, that the God I was raised with wouldn’t damn me to hell for dabbling in tarot cards and other New Age practices.

Quite frankly the minute I believed that in my heart of hearts, more doors opened.

I’m still very much on a self-discovery spirituous journey, but what I can confirm is I believe in higher powers and I believe in fate.

I believe the higher powers consist of not only a traditional God that is male, but also a higher Feminine power *think Virgin Mary vibes on steroids*, and I believe in the power of the earth and the spirit.

I believe in complexity, I believe in power, and I believe in coexistence.

Emily SmithLeave a comment