New York Apartment Moments

I moved to New York City almost immediately after I graduated college in 2017. The stars aligned and aligned, and continued to align and I’m still here, with the same company, jivin’ on.

One thing I’m frequently asked, by friends, family, and strangers alike is, “How much longer are you staying in New York?”

When I first moved to New York, this question always made sense for people to ask me. My internship had an end date, I have no family here, costs are outrageous for housing, I moved here knowing only one person and that person I honestly only knew from a few shared classes in college. There was nothing grounding me here, I knew that and that’s why it was such a valid question for people to ask me.

Then, the internship abruptly ended 2 months in – because I got promoted 😉

So things only then started to become a bit grounding for me – my job became a real adulty job, friendships began rapidly growing, and almost excessively I began meeting more people… the city was morphing into my home. Yet as the years go by, I still get asked, “How much longer, Emily?”

Recently it clicked that the reason I’m asked so much, besides the point of people simply wanting me closer to them, is that maybe I’m not speaking enough about how much this place is my home.

When my mamaw passed away my freshman year of high school, she had cancer and it was incredibly touch and go a lot of the time. It hit a point where my dad ultimately told me, “No news is good news.” Which, in some weird way, I think this phrase held so much reassurance to me that I carried it on through to my adulthood. I treat everything with a “no news is good news” attitude – even in the very way I conduct my conversations with others. If I’m not talking about an aspect of my life, I assume everyone must realize that’s because those parts are good, or maybe even great! But what I’ve failed to understand is that this means when I’m talking in detail about anything… maybe I dwell a bit more on the bad or negative things happening – which then in turn paints a more negative picture of my life to others.

So of course it makes sense that people are asking me, “How much longer are you staying in New York, Emily?” because they’ve really only been hearing a quick quip of “Oh yeah, it’s great but…” and then I dive more in depth about mouse horror stories, or the terrible roommates, not to mention they regularly hear me say, “Send the package to my office because things get stolen from my apartment!”

Today, I’ve decided to switch my narrative and share with you all some little magical things about each place I’ve lived in NYC, to spread some positivity around 🙂

. . .

HARLEM: MAY 27, 2017 – AUG 1, 2017

This was the apartment that welcomed me with open arms into the city. Albeit, itty-bitty tiny arms, but welcoming arms nonetheless. I paid $750 per month to live here incl. utlities (3 bedroom but I never saw one one of the roommates)

WHAT I’VE SHARED WITH OTHERS: I lived with a bartender who would come home with her friends at 5AM and proceed to throw crazy parties each morning. There was no AC, and the dead of summer in NYC was so unbearable, every night I would take a cold shower and then take a washcloth to put behind my neck to keep me cool throughout the night. Living here was also the brokest I’d ever been in my life. It was rough, and not only all of that, my bedroom was so terribly small that I could lay on the floor and have my fingers touch one side and my toes touch the other (and I’m somewhere between 5’4″ – 5’5″!)

THINGS I’VE NEVER SHARED: Almost every night, just before falling asleep, I would get to relax to the sound of a neighbor playing jazz music from their window, sometimes opera music, but mainly classic jazz. It was one of those grounding “I’m in NYC, I’m here…” moments, it felt like a scene from a movie – to fall asleep to that music on a twin-size mattress on the floor of a Manhattan apartment. There was also this Halal place at the end of my block and they had the best lamb over rice I’ve ever had… period. And the commute to work from this apartment was one of the most stable commutes I’ve experienced.

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CHINATOWN: AUG 1, 2017 – OCT 27, 2018

This place felt like a step up from my first apartment because the room had a queen size bed OFF THE GROUND, was generally larger, and also it was downtown right around where I loved going out the most. I also only paid $750 a month to live here incl. utilities (5 bedroom).

WHAT I’VE SHARED WITH OTHERS: I lived in a five bedroom apt but a couple of the rooms generally had more than one occupant. Most of the occupants did not speak English. And we also had several furry roommates that did not pay rent – AKA MICE. WE HAD ALL THE MICE. It was a terror, one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced. Link here to my personal blog to read more of those deets. I also lived above a grocery store which was under the Buddhist temple, which was under the Chinese Mafia gambling ring location (if you’ve seen Marvelous Mrs. Maisel it was identical to what Joel stumbled upon when opening his club..) – then after climbing all those stairs you’d find yourself at my apartment. We also had a stove top but not an oven – and I didn’t catch this until after I moved in…

THINGS I’VE NEVER SHARED: Some of the craziest party nights of my life took place while I lived here and my roommates put up with my drunken loudness silently and without complaint. Even though communication was hard at times, it was somehow a friendly almost family like atmosphere you could tangibly feel. One roomie had an adorable Yorkie named Cofi and it was so fun to get greeted by her each day. Living in Chinatown itself made it feel even more real that I was in New York – or more like out of the country even. Just walking around the area, I get that same buzz in my soul that I get when traveling to a new city. Then the smell hits me and I’m ready to bounce, but you get the idea 😉 UGH AND LASTLY THE FOOD WAS PHENOM!!!!!!! So phenom…

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SPANISH HARLEM: OCT 27, 2018 – JULY 31, 2020

If I said Chinatown felt like a step up, man oh man, just hold your horses for this place. It was newly renovated with exposed brick in every room, only one flight of stairs to climb, WASHER AND DRYER IN UNIT!! It was a dream. I paid $1,207 a month plus utilities to live here (2 bedroom)

WHAT I’VE SHARED WITH OTHERS: Roaches, roaches, roaches. The renovations throughout the building rattled the roaches and our apartment was coated in the beasts. My roommate and I had severely different cleanliness standards. There was a loud motorcycle gang that would rumble through the neighborhood at all hours, right by our windows. Lastly, our super and management company were the worst…

THINGS I’VE NEVER SHARED: You could buy the prettiest freshest flowers and herbs from nearly any corner of any block whether its a bodega or a genuine flower shop – Spanish Harlem was stocked. And everything was fairly priced too. Speaking of Bodegas, there was a bodega on the corner of our block with the absolute best burgers and fries ever. Best enjoyed at the end of a night out. And the guys who worked there, along with those who also shopped there from the neighborhood, were the absolute friendliest people who could always bring a smile to my worn out face. I’ve also embarrassingly had a card declined there and they let me just have my order on the house without even a second thought. On another note, people would often park right outside our windows and blare music. To which I had a love/hate relationship with, but reflecting back it was mostly love. On Sundays it was typically soulful gospel music, and every other day the genre was fair game. I also often found myself Shazaming their music and adding it to my own playlists to jam to later. And lastly, every morning on my walk to the train, I always exchanged a nice “good morning” with a traffic cop – it was small thing, but it was still a burst of kindness I could count on each morning.

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Most currently, I’ve found myself out of Manhattan and living in Williamsburg, Brooklyn. This place… I’ve only said good things about this place. I feel blessed to have evolved up to this point – great roommates I actually enjoy hanging out with, a BEAUTIFUL, BEAUTIFUL APARTMENT WITH ALL THE AMENITIES… the cover photo for this article is the view from my building’s rooftop…

It’s a dream.

To reflect back on the whole, “no news is good news” thing – I shouldn’t have carried this past the situation with my mamaw. No news is good news is best for situational uses only. It’s so important to share the good things with those who care about you, because if you only share the bad, they’re going to worry and assume that’s all there is. Bad.

So share your good news, share your great moments, share the small nice moments – don’t assume everyone knows you’re experiencing good things. As my nana always says, “Do you know what happens when you assume? You make an ASS out of U and ME!“

Emily SmithLeave a comment

Witchcraft for October 2020

Double, double, toil and trouble!

Spooky season is upon us. What better time to connect with your inner witch??

NO, witchcraft is not satanism or flying on broomsticks or cursing your enemies (although, you could, but the most important rule of Magick is “harm none” because karma is a B*tch!) However, witchcraft IS connecting to the powers of nature and grounding your spirit in the ways of the universe. Doesn’t sound too bad, right?

October is a HUGE month, so I’m not going into everything. In fact, I’m only going to write about two major days in this article.

If you’re afraid to read about witches because of a stereotype you hold with you…then run along, nothing to see here. If you’re curious about ways you can enhance your natural gifts with the help of Magick this month, then take a seat on my broom and away we fly!

October 16: New Moon

Right in the middle of month this year is our October new moon! The new moon is the very first phase of a new lunar cycle, and the moon is barely visible at this time. Since the day of a new moon is the beginning of the moon’s cycle, it’s a great time to set goals, intentions and projects for the following month. The evening of a new moon is also considerably darker, since the light of the moon is mostly hidden. Therefore, this is the best time to reflect on your “dark side” and how you can either improve it, or put it to good use. To summarize, the new moon is a time of reflection, intentionality and purpose.

Crystals to meditate with:

  1. Moonstone (for comfort during times of change)
  2. Tourmalinated Quartz (for cutting ties or freeing yourself from restrictive situations or relationships)
  3. Amethyst (for planning ahead)

Incense to burn:

  1. Rosemary (for clarity)
  2. Myrrh (for balance and wisdom)
  3. White Sage (for protection and purification)

October 31: Samhain/Halloween

Ahh, Halloween. The favorite holiday of all the spooky souls out there. Costumes, candy, jack-o-lanterns and killer parties (pun somewhat intended) are some things that come to mind. However, to practicing witches out there, October 31st is the festival of Samhain (a celtic word, pronounced sow-win). This is not only a harvest festival, but also marks the beginning of the darker seasons. In autumn and winter, when nights are longer, the veil between the living and spirit realms is thinner, making communication to those who have passed on much simpler. On Samhain, though, the veil is at its thinnest! Therefore, Samhain is celebrated by honoring your ancestors…and maybe getting to communicate with them too!

If you’re interested in partaking in some Samhain festivities, don’t worry! You don’t have to be a witch to honor your ancestors. You also don’t have to hold a seance or play with a ouija board in a graveyard. Here’s a simple ritual you can hold on your own, no matter what religion you may practice.

Go outside at night on Halloween (i.e. your porch or backyard) or if you don’t want to venture out, just shut out all the lights in your bedroom. Turn off your phone/television/computer to eliminate from distractions. Sit or lay down somewhere comfortable and hold something that is a family heirloom of some kind. If you don’t have any of those, hold a family photo! Close your eyes and begin meditation by recounting your family tree (either mother’s side or father’s side, or both). I’ll write out the start of my mom’s side so you know what I mean:

…

I am Zoë C., daughter of Jill C. who teaches and paints

She is the daughter of Woody & Cathy C., a carpenter and a writer.

He is the son of Woodrow and Mary-Louise C., a carpenter and a mother. She is the daughter of David and Marjorie J., a teacher who fought in WWII and a hardworking secretary.

…

Continue as far back as you can go until you can’t remember the names, then say “and those whose blood runs in my veins that I haven’t met and cannot name.”

This simple meditation is beautiful way to honor your ancestors, and since the veil is thinnest on Samhain, you can be certain that they’ll hear you!

Crystals to meditate with:

  1. Rhodonite (for grounding/reconnecting with Mother Earth)
  2. Citrine (for gratitude)
  3. Black Obsidian (for clear negativity and unblock chakras)

Incense to burn:

  1. Myrrh (for balance and wisdom)
  2. Patchouli (for spiritual growth and nostalgia)
  3. Lotus (to open the mind’s eye)

All Month

Meditate regularly.

The dark seasons are here, and this is often when people suffer more from anxiety and depression. Meditating (with or without crystals) keeps you grounded and sane. If you haven’t tried meditating yet, it can be daunting! So try out 5 minutes of sitting in silence with your eyes closed, focusing on your breath, and then gradually you’ll be able to meditate deeper and for longer!

Burn sage often.

Since the veil is getting thinner, what is a better time to keep your home pure of unwanted spirit or energy than by burning some sage? Focus on areas you spend most of your time in or areas that feel…off. It’s all about trusting your gut (and your ancestors)!

Get a fern or an aloe plant for your home.

Both of these plants are great to have in your house all year, but they’re even better in October! Ferns protect your home from negative energies as well as aid in cleansing the negative energy that might be hanging around. Aloe Vera also helps absorb bad energy and bring luck and prosperity your way. Can’t beat that!

I hope you found this article helpful for your practice or at least learned something new.

An’ it harm none, do what ye will.

Zoë CardinalLeave a comment

Mindfulness Magic

Stop what you’re doing for a second. Stop reading this and do these five things:

  1. Look around the room and name five things that you can see.
  2. Focus on four things that you can feel.
  3. Name three things that you can hear.
  4. Notice two things that you can smell. 
  5. Focus on one thing that you can taste.

Congrats! You’ve just completed your first grounding technique that is taught many times in practicing mindfulness. It’s supposed to help bring you back into the present moment, which is a main component of mindfulness.

Mindfulness, noun: the state of being conscious or aware of something.

Headspace.com describes mindfulness as, “…the quality of being present and fully engaged with whatever we’re doing at the moment — free from distraction or judgment, and aware of our thoughts and feelings without getting caught up in them.”

A lot of us are always going, always moving, thinking “okay when I get off work I have to do ____.”, “I can’t wait until the weekend so I can go ____.”, “I’m so worried about ____ because I can’t control ____.”

Does that sound familiar? It’s because we’re not present. We’re not living the beautiful moment that is right now. Everything before this moment is unchangeable, and everything after this moment is unpredictable. Sure, it’s okay to get excited about something happening in your future, but think about the times when that thought of excitement turns into anxious thoughts, worrying, etc. It sucks and it causes a lot of issues — I’m speaking from lots of experience. Even as I write this I’m experiencing it. LOL.

Have you ever thought about how mindful you’re being at any given moment? Researchers on mindfulness put together this quick little questionnaire to help you out!

You might be wondering why this matters — what are the benefits to being more mindful? Lucky for you, Headspace is back at it again with the wonderful information you need:

  • You’ll have lower glucose levels.
    • Researchers at Brown University found that those who scored higher in mindfulness were more likely to have healthier glucose levels than those who scored lower.
    • Mindful people are more inclined to believe they can change important things in their life as well, found in a study from the University of Pennsylvania. Mindfulness helps people feel less ashamed when presented with advice; making them more motivated to change.
  • Develop better eating habits.
    • Think about it! (Pun intended). Being more thoughtful about your food choices would obviously help you identify when you’re hungry, satiated, or too full.
  • Less anxiety and stress.
    • Researchers at Georgetown University Medical Center found that patients with anxiety disorder (omg meeeeeeee) had reduced stress hormone and inflammatory responses to stressful situations after taking a mindfulness meditation course.
  • Better ability to focus and improved memory.
    • Again, researchers published papers in the Journal of Management finding mindfulness stabilizes attention to the present moment. Those who studied mindfulness meditation were more likely to remain vigilant longer during tasks.
    • UC Santa Barbara researchers found that simply two weeks of mindfulness training can improve reading comprehension, working memory capacity, and ability to focus.
  • An increase in pain relief.
    • Wake Forest Baptist researchers conducted a double-blinded study including 78 healthy volunteers, and found that pain was reduced by over 20% after meditation.
  • Better sleep! Yay!
    • According to an article published by JAMA Internal Medicine, sleep from meditation improved in older adults that had trouble sleeping.

So like… where’s the negative? I’ve had some pushback from people when I express my love for mindfulness meditation and I don’t get it. What’s the worst that could happen? Even if you tried meditating for 10 minutes and didn’t feel you were “doing it right”, you were still able to get 10 minutes to yourself, right? You time is the most important time.

You deserve to live in the moment. You deserve to be present. You deserve not to worry or feel anxiety about the past or the future, because it’s unchangeable. What already happened, happened. And what’s going to happen, is going to happen, whether you like it or not.

I’ll leave you with a quote by boss babe meditation teacher and author, Megan Monahan:

“There is no good or bad meditation. The only bad meditation is the one you don’t do.”

“Don’t Hate, Meditate” – Episode 312 of Highest Self Podcast

Lindsey MorrowLeave a comment

Finding Peace

This article is the conclusion to a journey I began years ago. I’ve shared some personal stories about domestic abuse, some destructive coping mechanisms I used, and now it is time to talk about the peace I found after it all. I kept reiterating in my previous articles how we are not the victims forever, and I stand by that to this day. I wouldn’t be where I am without these humbling experiences. I grew my own wings that my gut was trying to tell me to do for years. With the help of my friends and family and self-determination, I was able to be the woman I always knew I was.

Initially, I was scared. I had no money, no motivation, and felt like my career was in the hole, and I had to block out a lot of people in my life. But what was really happening was that I was saving money, building stronger relationships with my close friends, and truly focusing on myself for once. I found myself developing a skin routine and a forming a healthy diet. I planned my future. I went back to college and now am on a path to graduate in a year.

What also became a constant in my life was spirituality. I never had been a religious person and I’m still not. Yet, I found spirituality really explained and helped me with a lot of things that have happened in my life. We all say cliche things like “everything happens for a reason” and “there are no such things as coincidences.“ Heck, I truly believe all that now! I believe people are put into and removed from your life and it’s all apart of the journey. Some people are not meant to be along for the ride and that’s okay. I came to the conclusion that I could find peace in knowing the things I can control vs the things I cannot and should not force. I have everything I need in my life to make the difference I’ve always wanted to make.

I made a vow to not let another person, especially a man, ruin or disrupt my inner peace. Yes, there are days where that was very hard to do, but ultimately, I am happy without the stress and chaos. I truly am blessed to have gotten to know the side of a man that I never thought I’d see again. I had been given a gift in the form a gentle, kind, selfless, respectful human. My boyfriend was put into my life and I have cherished every waking moment with him. He is a significant factor that has played a huge part in my searching for peace. He helped me realize that just because I was a victim and enabler before, doesn’t mean it’s going to happen again and that is such a relieving feeling to know I’m still able to love and to be loved.

For the women or men that have walked in these shoes, there is happiness and success resting on the other side of this hill. Peace is found in many forms: a loving friend’s smile, a cup of coffee in the morning, and instead of thinking about your troubling past….you think about your exciting dreams, a week secluded in the woods watching the sunset, connecting with a religion or your spirituality, starting a self care routine, or even writing about your journey and being able to appreciate the things currently around you that you never thought would come from it. We all deserve peace and you will find it.

. . .

If you or someone you know is being affected by abuse and needing support, call 1-800-799-7233, or if you are unable to speak safely, you can log onto thehotline.org or text LOVEIS to 1-866-9474.

You are not alone.

Koreena BirdwellLeave a comment

And That’s on Periodt, Cup: My Menstrual Cup Experience

My period has always been an issue — much like it has been for most people who menstruate! For the majority of my life I’ve begrudgingly gone the pads, tampons and panty liners route. With this has also come irritations, yeast infections, and overall extreme discomfort.

PLEASE NOTE

I am extremely thankful I am to live in a country where these options are available whenever I need them. I know it’s not this easy in lots of places in the world, so I will be categorizing this as a “first world problem”.

    I had heard about the menstrual cup a couple years ago. Initially I thought it was for hippies and would be a trend that’d die out soon — LOL. We have to laugh at how small-minded we were at some point, right?

    About a month and a half ago I started getting Instagram ads about menstrual cups (shout out to the FBI for planting that seed; no pun intended). So I thought, “what the hell, let’s do some research.” I put up an Instagram poll on who out of my followers loved/hated the cups if they’d tried them and why. The answers were all over the board, but a common theme was that they loved it once they got used to it.

    What is a menstrual cup?

    It’s a small, rubber/silicone funnel-like cup you insert into your vagina to catch your period fluids. They hold a surprisingly large amount of liquid because a lot of the time you don’t bleed as much as you think you do. They’re a more eco-friendly alternative to pads and tampons; you can go for up to 12 hours before you need to remove it!

    I hate to say it but the ad did its job! I found out which cup I’d like to try first, the size that worked for me, and didn’t look back. I recorded my experience this past week — check it out below!

    Youtube: My Menstrual Cup Experience

    As mentioned, I went with The DivaCup, but feel free to try whatever works for you! With the DivaCup there are three different types:

    1. Model 0: For ages 19 and under.
    2. Model 1: For ages 19-30 and haven’t given birth vaginally.
    3. Model 2: For those who are either over age 30, have a heavier flow, or are at any age and have given birth vaginally.

    On their website, DivaCup shared that the average person creates 300 POUNDS of waste in a lifetime from using disposable period products. Not to mention the massive amount of money you’ll save. One DivaCup is around $40 that you can use for an entire year before having to re-buy. I know for a fact I spend that at least every two months when using pads or tampons.

    Thankfully, you have plenty more options to choose from in the menstrual cup world! And since I am so passionate about period health, I took it upon myself to share those with you (you’re welcome, bb):

    FLEX Cup

    The FLEX Cup, $32: This cup is different in that it has a pull tab which some find easier for removal. It comes in both the Slim Fit and the Full Fit. The Bonus Pack available also comes with two menstrual discs if that is more comfortable for you.

    Lumma Cup

    The Lumma Cup, $42: This is a flexible disc with three sizes available designed to fit into the round walls of the vagina. There is a longer string attached making it easy to remove as well.

    Menstrual Cup vs. Menstrual Disc: What’s the difference?

    PUTACUPINIT.COM

    According to putacupinit.com, menstrual cups sit at the vaginal canal below the cervix. They can be folded into a number of shapes, and have a structured form to help collect the period flow. They are said to be a little more comfortable to insert. Cups create suction when inserted and removed (in order to prevent leakage), meaning you have to *pinch* the cup inside before removing to break the seal. SOMETHING I DIDN’T FIND OUT UNTIL JUST NOW: even though they normally aren’t, menstrual cups are able to be worn during sex.

    Menstrual discs sit lengthwise into the vaginal fornix behind the cervix and are tucked behind the pubic bone. They are inserted by squeezing the sides together (like a taco). Even though they can’t be folded into a multitude of shapes, they have a more flexible body to collect period flow. Discs don’t create a suction, but like the cup, they still do require dislodging with your finger and kegel muscles for removal. They’re also a little more prone to make a mess upon removal. However, the best part: they’re more recommended for wear if you’re wanting to get your freak on — just be sure to empty it before and after!

    Long story short: I loved the period cup and will continue to use it until menopause lolz. I just have to get the light flow situation figured out! Cups being eco-friendly, causing less irritation, ability to sleep in them, provide up to 12-hour protection, and (discs) allowing you to have mess-free period sex?! Sign me up, luv.

    Lindsey MorrowLeave a comment

    When to Let Go & Let Karma

    People usually aren’t that surprised to learn I’m an older sister. I tend to give off Type A vibes and even if I’m the drunkest person in the room, I’m still the quickest to sober up and help someone who’s in a worse state of mind than I am. What does surprise people is the amount of siblings I have – a whopping five. I have three not-so-little brothers and two not-so-little sisters and we’re all stair-stacked in age – 25, 23, 20, 18, 14, and 12. We all have severely different personalities, but within the differences obviously there are some defining traits that unify us as siblings. We all have a sharp tongue, zero patience for stupid questions, and we’re all incredibly selective about who we let get close to us.

    So with us having severely different personalities yet a similar approach to people in terms of being guarded and slightly aggressive, you can imagine how intense some conversations can get within the Smith Clan.

    Most recently I had a crazy theological discussion/debate with my 20 year old brother, Jackson. Now, as some background, Jack has a photographic memory, his head is full of the most random knowledge of the most intricate of things, we joke that a conversation with him is “Jack Jeopardy“. He’s an actor who’s been on stage since he was in elementary, which has empowered him to have a great speaking voice and everything he says is laced with such a projected conviction that you feel no need to dispute him half of the time as he seems as reputable as Wikipedia.

    Jack has always had a rampant imagination that has him questioning every basic level thing most take for granted, which somehow transcended through age into him being able to have long conversations with anyone about anything – even on topics he genuinely knows nothing about. He knows how to ask those thought provoking questions that push the conversations along through twists and turns you hadn’t originally intended.

    It was the other day when Jack and I somehow had a conversation about beliefs and Christianity that morphed into the power of karma. I am a firm believer that what goes around comes around, karma is real and you can’t convince me otherwise. Jack on the other hand, strongly argues that karma is interpreted completely wrong this day and age. He insists that karma isn’t about instant just consequences, the idea of karma transcends lifetimes and what you do in this life, affects your next life, and what you experience now is a product of your past life. So with Jack’s definition of karma, he doesn’t think that karma is enough in terms of punishment, because if someone does something bad in this lifetime, they won’t reap the effects of it until their next lifetime, and what’s the good in that?

    These two ideologies of karma, one with rapid consequences and one with not so rapid consequences, is what lead to the big debate: Let go and let karma?

    Jack will tell you…

    Heck, no. Karma isn’t real, and if it is how could you possibly trust karma to take care of someone that has done serious wrongs, like Henry Kissinger? He is a man who should be charged with war crimes, but he won’t ever get punished for them. He should pay for the terrible things he has done, how can someone be as rich as him and also walk away unscathed from the bad he has done if karma is real? If karma is truly real, he would pay for these crimes, since what goes around comes around. Furthermore, if karma is real, it is not enough of a punishment, karma is nothing more than an excuse for societal inaction. Individuals need to take onus, for we are responsible for our own reality, delivering justice where justice is due, and we should not leave the fate of terrible people up to the universe.

    To that I say…

    It’s complicated. While I am a firm believer in karma, I fullheartedly agree that we are responsible for our own reality. These two things, karma and onus, coincide for me in that I don’t believe in always handing the reigns over to karma. Not at all. If you are presented with a situation where there is an obvious bad party involved, follow the below procedure:

    Made on Canva by Peachy Keen Collective

    The are two very different endings to the above, you’re either letting go or you’re actively trying to correct the situation. For the sake of the conversation, Jack heavily focused on Henry Kissinger being a prime example of how karma isn’t real or isn’t enough. But if you’re a believer in karma you’ll understand the following:

    Karma is not always obvious.

    It is very easy to think that wealthy people couldn’t possibly ever reap the effects of karma because they have so much money to ward it off. But karma wouldn’t get to someone in a way that isn’t right for them, karma isn’t going to come at the rich by attempting to drain their bank account dry with broken down car after broken down car.

    Karma comes at each individual appropriately.

    Maybe Henry Kissinger will never know true happiness, maybe none of his friends are real, maybe most people in his closest circle hate his guts. You can’t tell me little things like that aren’t micro acts of karma coming to play. So if you can sit back and let karma do its thing, then it’s better to think in this mentality, that karma is not in the big things, it’s in in the little things. Just as the little things can bring you happiness, the little things can also pile up and crush you down.

    Sometimes, karma needs a hand.

    Back to Henry Kissinger, I know, I know, it’s random but so is my brother so this is where the conversation went. Jack says karma is an excuse for societal inaction – if this is the case, then honestly, be the change you wish to see. What can you do to make Henry Kissinger uncomfortable? Email him, send him letters of everything he’s done wrong and that which makes him a war criminal in your eyes. Batter him with reminders of his wrongdoings. Be the bell constantly ringing in his ear.

    There’s always something you can do.

    So this translates into other areas of life, if someone in your work or personal life has done something that’s simply wrong – think about your options and how you can right the wrong, whether it’s a direct conversation with them calling them out, or maybe the wrong is deeper than that and a higher entity needs to get involved – do what is right. This is also where karma becomes a bit self-serving, when you’re righting the wrongs of others for a greater purpose, you are also bringing good karma upon yourself. What goes around comes around, remember?

    . . .

    Ultimately, it’s up to you whether you let go and let karma. While I personally believe in the power of karma, and have very much seen it rear its head and kick dirt into the face of those most deserving, some people haven’t seen it and/or simply don’t believe in it – like my brother. While, him and I were able to have this insane discussion on karma, the funny thing is… he really doesn’t believe in it at all. Not one bit – even what he described karma to be, he doesn’t believe in that either. But he is able to see how others can believe, and is able to have a conducive conversation about it in order to better understand the world and those that live in it.

    Emily SmithLeave a comment

    Social Media: The Wild Frenemy

    Social media is wild, absolutely wild. It’s a force of nature that we treat as the annoying storm that never passes, but really, it’s a waking tsunami filled with inspiration, motivation, and community. It’s indubitably the ceaseless war between left and right, positivity and negativity; it’s your side, my side, yet is it ever the truth? Social media has the power to grow the smallest of feats and the ability to take down even the strongest of foundations.

    Social media is everyone’s frenemy.

    It’s that person you keep close to you out of fear of what will happen when out of sight, it’s the person that sometimes when you let your guard down with them you find they’re actually not that bad, but it’s also the person that you do let your guard down with… and it’s exactly what you expected: your words get twisted and shared, your meaning lost, and your venting rant falls into the ears of a snake, it’s now something that can never be erased… the way others view you now tainted.

    I grew up in a weird transitioning stage of technology. My first phone was a Cingular flip phone, with no camera, I had a trove of VHS tapes, portable DVD players were the shit, and I got a Facebook when I was in sixth grade (2006) then a Myspace the following year – oh, was my mom mad about the socials.

    In these early years of social media and multimedia messaging, parents and teachers alike were quick to preach to us all, “What you post and what you text lives on the internet forever, be careful!” As we grew up, ‘be careful’s morphed into, “Your job looks at your social media as much as they look at your resume, think about your future!”

    So, I’ll say it again – social media is wild.

    It has single-handedly fired up civil rights movements, kept these movements relevant, and it’s created community. Everyone can find a community on social media, they can learn about causes they never even knew to care about, they can find an account to follow with the right inspiration they’ve been looking for. Across the board between Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, the limit does not exist with how you can shape, reshape, and reshape again, what your feed and what your personal brand looks like.

    If you feel your socials are one note, or too political, or too this, or too that… change up your algorithm.

    Go through the accounts you follow, the people you’re friends with, and follow/unfollow – get things off your feed that don’t bring you happiness, advance your knowledge, or aid in personal growth.

    Instagram was an easy cleanse – I unfollowed a lot of the random meme accounts and celebrities and then asked myself what I wanted to see, what I needed to see, during moments throughout the day when I take my IG scroll breaks. Do I want to see what food people are eating? Or how about the same dumb meme with knock-knock-joke level humor shared one million times across like 10 accounts? Heck, no! I wanted some finer scrolling content, thank you.

    I wanted quality, inspirational, powerful content. After each scroll break, I wanted to feel rejuvenated and ready to take back on the world. I wanted girl power content, I wanted spiritual content, astrology out the ass content… I followed accounts like The Female Hustlers, Black Female Therapists, Oh That Witch Again, and Taurus Scopez.

    With Facebook, I felt a bit more conflicted on how to cleanse as I’m not typically one to randomly delete people – which is the standard way to cleanse these days. I generally feel that deleting people isn’t really erasing the problem, and I also think it’s important to try to put yourself in other’s shoes whenever possible. So by not deleting people, I get to do this, attempt to somehow see the world through their eyes – what they come across on their timeline, decidedly resonate with, and then go as far as to share onto their own platform… it says a lot about them. What one shares on social media is very telling about how they are as a person.

    FYI this is me lowkey admitting that I psychoanalyze what most everyone posts 😉

    Ultimately, my Facebook solution was to actively go through and make sure I was following, like actively going to profiles and hitting the follow button, those friends who have a good rep in terms of posting a wide range of content. My second solution was to find private groups to join. My top favorite groups that keep my Facebook feed filled with Grade A quality content are The Solo Female Traveler Network and Road to 100 Countries. Both pages keep my feed adequately filled with people’s personal travel stories, their tips, and overall inspo to get out, travel, face any fears and knock down any barriers.

    So as wild as social media is, I think we must face that it’s something you can’t really ignore or pretend doesn’t matter in this day and age. You just can’t. So, take this frenemy by the horns and own it – make it what you want, because while you can’t ignore it, you can certainly tell it what to do.

    . . .

    Side note – with a post about social media I feel I should throw in that I hope you’re following PKC on Instagram & Facebook 🙂

    Emily SmithLeave a comment

    Being Ms. Cardinal

    “Every child deserves a champion: an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best they can possibly be.” -Rita Pierson

    On August 31, I’ll be starting my third year of being Ms. Cardinal. In July of 2018, I was hired by Uncommon Schools Inc. to be a 2nd grade teacher.

    Uncommon Schools Inc. is a chain of charter schools across Brooklyn, Newark and Boston that caters to low-income areas. Their mission is to get children who are born into the poverty cycle to get to and through college in order to break that cycle. Uncommon Schools Inc. truly is a chain of unordinary (or uncommmon) schools. Their teachers use very strict, though effective, methods in their classrooms in order to give structure to their students’ educational experience. Learning to teach in such a specific way is oftentimes a stressful, but usually rewarding, experience.

    My first year of teaching was interesting and very, very challenging. I loved being a teacher, but I didn’t feel like working in an elementary school was the right fit for me. Fortunately, Uncommon Schools allowed me to transfer to Brownsville Collegiate Middle School, where I currently teach 7th grade English. Teaching middle school sounds terrible to most people, but I actually love working with moody pre-teens!

    Over the summer, a new Instagram account was created where past Uncommon teachers or students could publicly express their issues with the charter school chain. I read all of them. I sadly agreed with a lot of the complaints that were posted, and it made me question whether or not my position was right for me. After reflection, I decided that teaching with Uncommon Schools was still the best place I could be, and so I chose to continue teaching at BVC.

    Why did I choose to stay? Below is my “why.”

    My Background:

    I’m from a small, suburban town in Indiana. The population of my hometown consists mostly of white families. My relatively large graduating class only had a handful of students that were POC. As a child, my father was an OBGYN. I never wanted for anything. Even my friends were considered to be in upper-middle class families. I never truly saw or felt poverty.

    After my parents got divorced, my mom went to college and eventually went on to get her Master’s degree in education. After my mom finished schooling, I didn’t know many people in my family that hadn’t gotten a college degree. Going to college was expected for my family and for most families in my hometown.

    Since I was raised in a very white, mostly christian atmosphere, going away to college and studying abroad introduced me to different cultures, religions and ethnicities, which I believe was a very important time in my life.

    Why I’m an English Teacher:

    At a very young age, I expressed interest in writing stories and poetry, which my family encouraged. My mother used to buy me blank hard-cover books to write stories and draw illustrations in. Writing and reading were always passions of mine. I also was known amongst my group of friends as being the “grammar police.” I’m surprised that they stuck it out and stayed friends with me after all of the times I corrected their speech!

    Along with my overall interest in the English language, I’ve always loved to learn anything I could. I also did well in school. I could honestly be a student forever if that were a possibility. School has been a place of joy for me 90% of the time. I know that I’m a minority here, but I hope to one day change a student’s mindset about school. I want to show my students that reading, writing and learning in general can be fun!

    My great grandad Jackson has been an inspiration to me as well.  He spoke fluent French, taught French and AP English at the high school in my hometown, ran the high school newspaper and even worked for the local newspaper. Almost every idea I came up with for future careers was influenced by him in some way: author, French translator, journalist, editor and more of the like. However, I always refused to say that I would be a teacher. Along with grandad Jackson, most of my family members are teachers or work in education. I didn’t want to be like everyone else, until I stumbled upon a job application for Uncommon Schools.

    Why I Chose Uncommon Schools:

    Being an Uncommon teacher gives me a sense a purpose. Teaching anywhere is important work, but teaching at schools in low-income communities is even more crucial. My first year with Uncommon opened my eyes to the reality of poverty and the social divide between whites and people of color. I felt the necessity of creating change in the education system and the urgency to do so. I am aware of the privilege I have as white woman and I want to use that privilege to make a difference, no matter how small. I see how much the kids in these schools need a stable teacher, or simply even another stable adult outside of home, that shows them love and respect and raises their confidence so they can succeed.

    Why I’m still Teaching at Uncommon:

    After reading the Instagram posts that I mentioned earlier over the summer, I questioned if the work I was doing actually was good work.  One day while I scrolling through these posts, I was interrupted by a phone call from a student: Dawein. He called me just to talk and to ask me a couple of questions, and after we hung up I realized how important our work at Uncommon truly is.

    Dawein came into BVC in 6th grade from a public school, at a pre-k reading level. I still cannot understand how a child can get by in elementary school without the ability to read, or more importantly, how a teacher can let that slide. Because of my experience teaching reading mastery, I got the opportunity to work with him all year on his decoding and comprehension skills. By the end of January, Dawein had mastered his first grade sight words. The day he passed the quiz, I broke out in tears in front of him and he hugged me with a huge smile on his face. Afterward, his confidence grew so much that he volunteered to read aloud in his performing arts class. He never would have chosen to read in front of his classmates before.

    I’m still Dawein’s main reading teacher. Dawein keeps me grounded in Uncommon’s mission: to get kids to and through college and to do our part to end the poverty cycle. I want to continue to help our kids like I’m helping Dawein. I know that these kids have the potential to grow, learn and succeed, despite the cards they have been dealt in life.

    Dawein called me again today. Knowing that he trusts me and is comfortable being honest with me is one of the greatest feelings I’ve known. I want my students to remember me as a teacher who showed that she cared about them, pushed them, loved them and did everything she could for them.

    I want to be a champion for my students.

    Zoë CardinalLeave a comment

    Changing and Growing: Grace Seward with Evergreen Video Production

    Much like the evergreen tree, we humans are constantly changing and growing. I sat down with Grace Seward, a pal from college-turned talented photographer and videographer of Evergreen Video Production. Enjoy her hand-picked favorite shots throughout — we love to see a friend succeed!

    L: Tell me about how Evergreen got started.

    G: I work at a local news station in Creative Services doing things like commercials. It didn’t get old, but it was a lot more “commercial” and less creativity. I have a friend, Lori of Lori O’Shea Films who is an Event Videographer and she’s always pushed me to get out there and flex my creative muscle. Within a few months I was kind of making a website… but not really. Out of the blue, Lori text me saying, “Hey, I booked a wedding for you! I need all your contact information ASAP.” I was like, whoa, okay let’s do this! I had to get it together and create an email address and Instagram page in order to get the ball rolling. So I was basically sitting on the couch, watching TV when Lori texted reaching out and starting this process for me. She’s been amazing every step of the way, uplifting me and giving me really helpful advice.

    L: We need friends who will push us sometimes! Speaking of, is it just you who is in charge at Evergreen, or do you have a partner?

    G: I do have a partner! It’s my boyfriend, Tayler, and me, he helps with more of the bookings. He’s really talented at knowing the business side of things like tax information and how to start actually making some money.

    L: Yes, get that money! So where did the name “Evergreen” come from?

    G: I didn’t want it to be just my name because it felt weird – also no one knows how to say my last name! (Pronounced Soo-Werd, FYI). I wanted it to be a product and not just me starting a business-type thing. Evergreen came about because I wanted it to be nature-related as well as the fact that my boyfriend has a music project, TwoPine. I thought well hey, I like trees too! And evergreens are always changing and growing which I found fitting.

    L: I love that! It’s so sweet that you found inspiration through him. What is your favorite piece of work you’ve done so far and why?

    G: My favorite would have to be the Bluegrass piece (pictured left) that I did because I got to be kind of weird and creative with it. I was able to get my friend, Megan, do some pretty “out there” poses and it honestly made me a little emotional! It helped me realize that I’m growing into an artist and not just someone who takes pictures.

    L: Right, because it’s always “your cousin who has a nice camera” vs. true photographers coming up with ideas, creative poses, etc. In that same realm, do you ever plan on taking pictures of anything besides people? What do you enjoy doing most?

    G: I really like taking pictures of people – I like shooting weddings the most currently. I do enjoy landscapes, but I find people more interesting and I think people normally want to look at other people.

    L: I agree. Do you have any other services besides photography?

    G: I’m open to anything, really. I would love to get even more creative. I feel the main marketable business right now is definitely weddings, but we can also do video. We can do music videos, local marketing videos – there are a lot of cool local businesses around here.

    L: Yes, there are such cool spaces to work with! Well to wrap things up, where can we find out more about Evergreen?

    G: I have a website, it’s https://www.evergreenvp.com/ – also an Instagram @evergreenvideo – and you can find me on Facebook at Evergreen Video Production. We have all of our pricing on the website as well!

    Lindsey MorrowLeave a comment

    Cat Mom Problems

    Where my cat people at??

    Seriously, I believe that cats are the greatest animals and pets on this planet. I know, some of you reading this might be “dog people” but just to clarify: although I think cats are the best, this doesn’t mean that I hate dogs. Dogs are adorable, stupid and obedient little fur babies. On the other hand, cats are independent, snuggly and sneaky tufts of love. Some people click better with dogs, and others with cats, but let’s agree that all animals are beautiful creatures, yea?

    Anyway, I’m the type of person that clicks better with cats. I mean, at one point in my childhood, a rather promiscuous Calico of mine named Snickers had so many kittens that we couldn’t give them all away fast enough. We had 12 cats roaming around our yard and bringing us dead birds for quite some time, and I loved it! This is part of what shaped me into the cat lady I am today. However, since felines are sassier and harder to train, there are issues that come along with being a cat parent. Most of these things are irritating in the moment, but man, they sure do some hilarious stuff when you replay their actions after the fact.

    Here are some annoying but comical problems that may arise if you have a cat:

    1. Cats are clumsy goobers.

    My cat, Ted Meowsby, seems to have zero awareness of his surroundings. It’s either that, or he just doesn’t give a hoot about what’s around him! Ted is a big boy– he’s part Maine Coon– and his tail is a giant force to be reckoned with. Often times, Ted will knock stuff off of tables just from flipping his tail from one side to the other. The best part about it, is when he accidentally topples a glass of water on the ground, he does not react at all. It’s like he pretends it didn’t even happen…or maybe he doesn’t even know it was him?

    Ted is also what you’d call a “tree dweller.” I have these very high cabinets in my kitchen that he can swiftly jump onto by going from the counter, to the fridge and up to the very top. Usually, this acrobatic feat is done seamlessly. Except I learned that if I move anything on top of the fridge, it throws off his rhythm and it ends badly. If he can’t get his footing right, he slides all the way down the side of my refrigerator with his arms up, trying to grab onto something. As he slides, all of my magnets and pictures come crashing down with him! One time, I had just finished sweeping and mopping my floors and Ted lost his balance trying to jump up to the top of the cabinets. He slid all the way down my fridge, and along down with him, my magnets and photos came my new, full, glass salt shaker. Of course it shattered and salt was everywhere. He walked away as if nothing happened. Typical Ted move.

    2. Cats are ferocious beasts.

    When I picked out Ted from the litter, I knew he’d be a rambunctious monster. He was the kitten that was crawling all over and biting at his sound-sleeping brothers and sisters. He did not care. He wanted attention! I saw that fuzzy rascal and thought, “this little guy is mine!”

    All kittens are little monsters, but Ted was a different kind, and still is. As a kitten, if I wore a maxi skirt, he’d latch on to the bottom of it with his front paws and slide around on the floor behind me as I walked. To this day, I can’t hang long curtains in my windows because he consistently would climb up them until they fell down. He even pulled down the entire shower curtain and its rod a of couple times, which was infuriating, but luckily he hasn’t tried that in over a year.

    My cat is a true hunter. When he doesn’t have a bug to chase, sometimes he decides to hunt me. He will swat at and pounce on my feet until he grabs ahold of them. Then, the biting commences. It’s not pleasant, but I know he’s having fun, so I let him do it until it really starts to hurt.

    As Ted gets older (he’ll be 3 on August 11!) he gets much less playful, which is honestly amazing. Even though he’s getting better, he still does a lot of crazy stuff that cause many a cat-scratch on my body. For example, his new favorite thing to do around February this year was to pounce on my head while I was sleeping! Sweet, right? He hasn’t done that in a few months, though and I’m praying for that phase to be over forever.

    3. Cats are territorial and bossy.

    Cat haters, I knot that you think all cats are mean and just like to hiss at you. However, most cats barely hiss once in their lifetime! Cats will only hiss if they feel threatened, and only very territorial cats are prone to hissing.

    Ted Meowsby, though a sweet and lovable guy to all humans he meets, is incredibly territorial when it comes to meeting other cats. He thinks he’s the only cat around that matters (and maybe that’s because I’ve spoiled him so much) but this ego of his makes him very mean to other kitties who cross his path! When Ted and I go to my mom’s house for holidays, she has to put her cat away in a separate room so a fight won’t break loose. They take turns being shut in a bedroom for a few hours with food and litter, then switch places. It isn’t ideal, but Ted could probably kill my mom’s tiny female Snow Shoe. My cat is the boss.

    Another funny example of my cat being bossy is how he claims certain spots on the bed or couch as his own. If I dare to sit in his spot on the couch, he will sit really close to me and then try to push me off the couch with his back legs! Also, as soon as I get up to do something, he immediately takes my seat. Don’t mess with the emperor of Apt. 28.

    _._._._._._._._._._._._

    There are so many other examples of how being a cat mom can be pain in the tail, that going into detail would take hours. Here are a few more things cats do that annoy their parents:

    -sitting on your laptop or right in front of your laptop when you’re using it

    -only eating a certain type of food and going on a hunger strike if it’s unavailable

    -opening up cabinets to find the hidden bag of treats and then ripping it open to eat them ALL

    -deciding to cuddle right when you have to get out of bed

    -stepping right on your bladder any time they walk across you

    -putting their paws in your water glasses

    -making ANYTHING a toy (I had to take down my xmas lights because he wouldn’t stop swatting)

    _._._._._._._._._._._._

    With all said and done, being a parent to a cat is one of the best parts of my life! They’re annoying as all get out, but they’re also great companions. They’re amazing bug hunters (seriously, I trained Ted to kill roaches for treats). They know when you’re sad or sick or simply in need of a little more love. They show their adoration for you by kneading on you or rubbing their little furry faces on you. Their human caregivers are their world, and even though they may piss us off sometimes, they’re honestly too cute to be mad at.

    Zoë CardinalLeave a comment

    Period Cravings Turn me into Ariana Grande

    That’s right. Every month when my godforsaken period rolls around, I want to eat all of the food. And by that, I mean everything in sight. I would normally describe myself as quite the #SnackQueen, but as soon as that time of the month rolls around, I can’t help but quote our Lord and Savior:

    I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.

    Ariana Grande

    So, why are we blessed with period cravings? According to healthline.com, it’s all thanks to the hormones! Estrogen and progesterone levels change right before your period starts, causing your diet to be even worse than it was before (if you’re me).

    Progesterone: Helps thicken the lining of the uterus to prepare for a fertilized egg. Also helps regulate the menstrual cycle.

    Estrogen: Basically… regulates the reproductive system as a whole.

    To sum it up, we’ve got progesterone in one corner and estrogen in the other ready to whoop my cranky, hangry ASS every time Aunt Flo pays me a visit. Rude.

    Let’s talk types of cravings now. During my most recent period I ate two entire boxes of Pop-Tarts in a day and a half. I also wanted all the carbs I could shove into my big mouth.

    Is this necessary? No.

    Is it needed? HELL. YES.

    “I want it, I got it,” remember?

    In that same Healthline article, it explains that craving carbs comes from something deeper the body is wanting: serotonin. That “S” word that everyone is on the hunt for these days. Turns out that eating an entire chicken alfredo from Fazoli’s isn’t the answer because it makes you feel more sluggish than before. Yay!

    That means don’t even THINK about eating two whole boxes of Pop-Tarts (@ myself) because all those sweets will cause you to crash hard. And you’re already about to get wrecked by mother nature. She is the ultimate HBIC {Head Bitch in Charge for those of you who aren’t #woke.}

    Now let’s compare notes. I’ll show you mine, you show me yours. Some of my other must-haves during The Crimson Tide are:

    • Chocolate + Peanut Butter ANYTHING
    • Taco Bell
    • Donuts. Especially with sprinkles. Good lord in heaven let them rain down on me
    • Bread. Bread. BREAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M OPRAH BECAUSE BREAD! TAKE ME TO PANERA RIGHT NOW! okay wow sorry
    • An order of Burger King fries bigger than Mount Everest. They have the best fries and if you disagree please tell me where to meet so we can fight
    • Almond milk yogurt — SPECIFICALLY vanilla — SPECIFICALLY Silk brand. My mouth waters at the thought.
    • Brownies. Duh.

    I could go on but this is starting to get weird. Your turn! Please share some of your fave period snacks/meals/anything with me. I’m always looking to expand my palate because even though my cravings got me feeling like Ariana Grande, my period as a whole can be described in four simple words:

    Lindsey MorrowLeave a comment

    One Track Mind: Embrace Complexity

    You know, I’m getting incredibly confused with the world lately. I’m confused how for every cause, there is someone with a counter cause. You know, the people who go, “Mask on?! What about SEX TRAFFICKING, huh?! DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT THAT?!” or “Black Lives Matter?! What about ALL LIVES MATTER, huh?! I MEAN, DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT THE STARVING CHILDREN IN AFRICA?!“

    It’s so crazy to me, like homeboy of course we care about all of these things… did you know you can care about multiple things all at the same time? And please, someone stop me here if I’m spoutin’ crazy… but I have more than one passion, I have more than one cause that matters to me… I am proudly a complex human over here.

    For example: I think you should really wear a damn mask, you bet your ass Black Lives Matter, sex trafficking is undoubtedly something that needs more media attention, teachers that have in-person classes this fall should be titled as essential workers (hazard pay?!), and we really need to SMASH THE PATRIARCHY!

    Oof, maybe got a tad excited at the end.

    But do you see what I’m saying? It’s so incredibly ignorant to think that someone only has a one track mind and that they are only capable of caring about one thing at a time. Just because you see them blasting one cause on social media, or photos of them only doing the same two things all the time – a person’s social media is not the sum total of that person. It’s just what you’re currently seeing, it’s their “highlight reel” if you will.

    Sky Banyes

    I’ve personally been struggling a lot lately with how people see me, and I have this fear that I’m being pigeonholed into a set personality. Yes, I very much enjoy going out and can probably drink half you readers under the table, but I don’t go out for the soul purpose of getting trashed. I go out because I enjoy the atmosphere, the socializing, the people watching, the dancing, the music, to put it simply – the vibrant hum of nightlife makes me feel alive.

    But you know what else makes me feel alive?

    Getting so absorbed in a book I accidentally stay up until 5:00 am just to finish it, hot summer days spent in the middle of lake, the minute the plane wheels hit the ground of the tarmac and that reality hits of “I’m here.” I feel alive the first snow of every winter and the turn of the first leaves every fall. I feel alive every time I get to make ricolis with my Papa, and I feel alive that moment of every family gathering when I find my siblings’ hiding spots and we all evade the bulk of the fam and randos together. I feel alive when I’m in a monster vehicle, windows down, flying down backroads, music blaring. I feel alive every time I return to Manhattan.

    I am more than what you see, I am more than what you think you know about me – and I always feel the same towards others. I always believe, and at times desperately hope, that they are more than what I see being posted online. People are complex, and it’s time everyone understands this.

    “It would be a terrible mistake to go through life thinking that people are the sum total of what you see.”

    Jonathan Tropper

    Emily SmithLeave a comment