That’s right. Every month when my godforsaken period rolls around, I want to eat all of the food. And by that, I mean everything in sight. I would normally describe myself as quite the #SnackQueen, but as soon as that time of the month rolls around, I can’t help but quote our Lord and Savior:
I see it, I like it, I want it, I got it.
Ariana Grande
So, why are we blessed with period cravings? According to healthline.com, it’s all thanks to the hormones! Estrogen and progesterone levels change right before your period starts, causing your diet to be even worse than it was before (if you’re me).
Progesterone: Helps thicken the lining of the uterus to prepare for a fertilized egg. Also helps regulate the menstrual cycle.
Estrogen: Basically… regulates the reproductive system as a whole.
To sum it up, we’ve got progesterone in one corner and estrogen in the other ready to whoop my cranky, hangry ASS every time Aunt Flo pays me a visit. Rude.
Let’s talk types of cravings now. During my most recent period I ate two entire boxes of Pop-Tarts in a day and a half. I also wanted all the carbs I could shove into my big mouth.
Is this necessary? No.
Is it needed? HELL. YES.
“I want it, I got it,” remember?
In that same Healthline article, it explains that craving carbs comes from something deeper the body is wanting: serotonin. That “S” word that everyone is on the hunt for these days. Turns out that eating an entire chicken alfredo from Fazoli’s isn’t the answer because it makes you feel more sluggish than before. Yay!
That means don’t even THINK about eating two whole boxes of Pop-Tarts (@ myself) because all those sweets will cause you to crash hard. And you’re already about to get wrecked by mother nature. She is the ultimate HBIC {Head Bitch in Charge for those of you who aren’t #woke.}
Now let’s compare notes. I’ll show you mine, you show me yours. Some of my other must-haves during The Crimson Tide are:
- Chocolate + Peanut Butter ANYTHING
- Taco Bell
- Donuts. Especially with sprinkles. Good lord in heaven let them rain down on me
- Bread. Bread. BREAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’M OPRAH BECAUSE BREAD! TAKE ME TO PANERA RIGHT NOW! okay wow sorry
- An order of Burger King fries bigger than Mount Everest. They have the best fries and if you disagree please tell me where to meet so we can fight
- Almond milk yogurt — SPECIFICALLY vanilla — SPECIFICALLY Silk brand. My mouth waters at the thought.
- Brownies. Duh.
I could go on but this is starting to get weird. Your turn! Please share some of your fave period snacks/meals/anything with me. I’m always looking to expand my palate because even though my cravings got me feeling like Ariana Grande, my period as a whole can be described in four simple words:
Peachy Keen Collective 
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